Vexigram (baroque word epiphany)

Vexigram is a baroque word epiphany service. Receive a single unique imaginary word, personally invented by our resident wordsmith and delivered to you anywhere in the world, for as little (or as much) as £3 a word.

Order A Vexigram Today

A single word on a piece of card, delivered direct to you, anywhere in the world. What will your word mean? It will mean nothing. Nothing at all. But it will be yours, and yours alone.

Each Vexigram will be a singular term, chosen furtively from the shallow depths of the imagination, written relatively neatly in ink on card, and sent out to you via the intricate mesh of postal services across the world.

Intended simply to perplex and confound the recipient via the absence of meaning, Vexigrams are a gift that remind us all, even if only fleetingly, of the limits of language. Every Vexigram shall be as exasperating to say as it is to hear, see, read, or use.

Vexigram – something that resembles a word but contains no meaningful idea or any possible use, especially those which do so in a particularly irritating way

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Notes:

1. Vexigram was created on May 6th, 2022
2. Vexigram has nothing to do with Lexigram at all and any suggestion to the contrary shall be denied
3. If you would like more information about Vexigram, please see this FAQ for answers.

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Support An Accumulation Of Things

If you like the things you've read here please consider subscribing to my patreon or my ko-fi.

Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.

(Ko-fi contributors probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more).

Thank you!


Lexigram

Lexigram is a bespoke word delivery service. Receive a single unique handwritten word, personally chosen by our resident wordsmith and delivered to you anywhere in the world, for as little (or as much) as £3 a word.

Order A Lexigram Today

A single word on a piece of card, delivered direct to you, anywhere in the world. What will your word be? It’s a mystery.

Each Lexigram will be a singular term, chosen secretively from the full breadth and depth of the English language, written relatively neatly in ink on card, and sent out to you via the intricate mesh of postal services across the world.

Intended simply to surprise and delight the recipient via the beauty of words, Lexigrams are a gift that remind us all, even if only fleetingly, of the pleasures of language. Every Lexigram shall be as beautiful to say as it is to hear, see, read, and use.

Autumnal
Lexigram #2: Autumnal

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Notes:

1. Lexigram was conceived, created, and finally initiated in April 2022
2. If you have further questions about Lexigrams please see here
3. As it is possible they have already been answered.
4. And if you’d like to purchase a Lexigram, please go here.
5. And buy as many as you wish.

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Support An Accumulation Of Things

If you like the things you've read here please consider subscribing to my patreon or my ko-fi.

Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.

(Ko-fi contributors probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more).

Thank you!


The Islands Of The World (ebook version)

The Islands Of The World (a guide) is available as an ebook at my ko-fi shop now, if that’s the sort of thing that excites you. It’s free/pay as you want.

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Support An Accumulation Of Things

If you like the things you've read here please consider subscribing to my patreon or my ko-fi.

Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.

(Ko-fi contributors probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more).

Thank you!


The Islands Of The World (a guide)

An artefact from another world, The Islands Of The World is a guidebook to the many strange and wonderful places that exist out there across the endless immensity of the seas.

Here among these hundred islands you will find wonders and whales, mountains and mermaids, sorrow and silence, forever frozen fields and ever-burning flames, alongside a treasure trove of carefully curated illustrations from around the world.

The Islands Of The World (a guide) is available now in a beautiful, fully illustrated, pocket book edition for £9.99/$12.99.

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Notes:

1. Written between the 1st and the 9th of September, 2021
2. The book version is quite nice
3. But also you can read it all for free on its own website if you want
4. And there’s also a full indexing of all the images I used there too
5. Alongside some more notes not included here
6. I like notes
7. Sorry about that

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Support An Accumulation Of Things

If you like the things you've read here please consider subscribing to my patreon or my ko-fi.

Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.

(Ko-fi contributors probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more).

Thank you!


Female Kill Machine

“It was the end of the 21st century. The space race had been won. The solar system had been colonised, the limits of human expansion had been reached. We had everything we wanted right here. Total corporate control of civilisation had been achieved. Quantum computing and nanotech alchemy allowed for the creation of any and every desired product at the instant of verified order confirmation and successful payment processing.

“It was a true utopia for all.

“In a world like this, there was only one frontier left on which any self respecting decillionaire could compete, and that was to try and perfect the ultimate technology and finally create a fully autonomous Female Kill Machine.”

Female Kill Machine is a lightning-paced absurdist quantum explosion of ever-escalating cyberpunk insanity and hyperviolence from the popular children’s author of Spiders Are Wonderful and Do Not Disturb The Dragon. Available on ko-fi (pay what you want); amazon (£2.99, or free on kindle unlimited); itunes (£2.99) and patreon (free for subscribers).

It’s about 25000 words / 120 pages long. It’s quite good please read it and maybe even recommend it to other people who you think might well want to read it too. Thank you.

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Notes:

1. Female Kill Machine was written between Monday 26th July, 2021 and Sunday 8th August, 2021
2. And edited on Monday 9th August, 2021
3. And then published on Tuesday 10th August, 2021
4. No point hanging around
5. It’s not like this is going to get any better with time
6. But still I hope you enjoyed it
7. And I’m sorry if you didn’t

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Support An Accumulation Of Things

If you like the things you've read here please consider subscribing to my patreon or my ko-fi.

Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.

(Ko-fi contributors probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more).

Thank you!