4/3/4 (anxiety suite)

#105:

haven’t felt right
all morning
woken from dream

***

#106:

something is wrong
with my heart
it aches, it aches

***

#107:

i need to cry
but i’m scared
i’ll never stop

***

#108:

not suicide
but instead
death by neglect

***

#109:

all i dream of
is to once
just be happy

***

#110:

anxiety
renders me
incapable

***

#111:

depressed depressed
depressed de
pressed depressed de

***

#112:

wasted a week
playing no
mans fucking sky

***

#113:

yes i am a
failure
of a human

***

#114:

i have begun
to lose my
whole fucking mind

***

#115:

my self laid bare
competence
is beyond me

***

#116:

i can’t keep my
heart beating
any longer

***

#117:

i cannot bring
myself to
believe you care

***

#118:

yes i could do
anything
if i weren’t me

***

#119:

a tiredness
creeping in
need something new

***

#120:

my teeth all buzz
as if they’re
electrified

***

#121:

imprecision
of language
a failing mind

***

#122:

i cannot write
anything
longer than this

***

#123:

one two three four
five six sev
en eight nine ten

***

#124:

i would blame this
on others
but it’s all me

***

#125:

the crows nested
in my heart
the worms, my mind

***

#126:

i like to sit
by the sea
dream of drowning

***

#127:

a small comfort
in the dream
as if its real

***

#128:

but then i wake
and somehow
its not the same

***

#129:

please forgive me
for my crimes
i’ve repented

***

#130:

i’m just not good
at any
thing at all

__________

Notes:

1. Written in September and October, 2019
2. Previous collections can be found here: #1; #2; #3; #4

__________

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