Tales From The Town #169: Bank Holiday Monday (Reprise)

“I can’t believe we don’t have to go to stupid school today!” Claire exulted. “On a Monday! That’s never happened before! Ever!”

“It literally happened earlier this month, Claire,” Tina sighed.

“No it didn’t,” said Claire.

“On May Day,” Ethel remarked.

“We only had Monday off then,” Claire said, bolstering her earlier argument with facts, even if they contradicted previous arguments she might well have presented before. “Now we’ve got the whole week off.”

“Like at Easter,” said Daniel, nodding knowledgeably (and also enthusiastically). “When it happened twice.”

“Shut up, Daniel,” said Claire. “Everyone just shut up. Don’t even try and spoil this!”

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Notes:

1. Written on Monday 3rd, 2024

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Tales From The Town #148: Bank Holiday Monday

“I can’t believe we don’t have to go to stupid school today!” beamed Claire. “On a Monday! That’s never happened before! Ever!”

“It literally happened last month, Claire,” Tina said.

“No it didn’t,” Claire said.

“At Easter,” Ethel replied.

“We didn’t have Monday off then,” Claire said, bolstering her earlier argument with facts. “We had the whole week off.”

“Twice,” said Daniel, nodding enthusiastically (and also knowledgeably).

“Exactly,” said Claire. “So there!”

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Tales From The Town #108: Seven Unrelated Incidents From Around The Town On A Bank Holiday Weekend In Early May

1. Lucy stood on the pier and looked out to sea. She did not care what was currently occurring behind her. The smoke of flames and ghosts neither mingle nor mix.

2. The dogs ran beneath the moons at noon, howling at every single one with a joy that was hard for any human heart to possess.

3. Yulia lay in a boat at the harbour and dreamed a dream of a dream within a dream, waking luxuriously from each one over the course of an especially decadent hour. Even the mermaid was jealous.

4. Smoke billowed up like volcanic clouds from the centre of town. Alarms sounded and were subsequently ignored.

5. The blinds in the mayor’s office opened briefly for a moment, then closed again before anyone had noticed.

6. The whale looked at the penguin and the penguin looked at the whale and the whale looked at the penguin and the penguin looked at the whale and not once did they blink or back down.

7. Edith’s barbecue clearly did not go as planned, but she insisted afterwards that in fact it absolutely had.

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Notes:

1. Written on May 17th, 2022

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Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.

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