#105:
haven’t felt right
all morning
woken from dream
***
#106:
something is wrong
with my heart
it aches, it aches
***
#107:
i need to cry
but i’m scared
i’ll never stop
***
#108:
not suicide
but instead
death by neglect
***
#109:
all i dream of
is to once
just be happy
***
#110:
anxiety
renders me
incapable
***
#111:
depressed depressed
depressed de
pressed depressed de
***
#112:
wasted a week
playing no
mans fucking sky
***
#113:
yes i am a
failure
of a human
***
#114:
i have begun
to lose my
whole fucking mind
***
#115:
my self laid bare
competence
is beyond me
***
#116:
i can’t keep my
heart beating
any longer
***
#117:
i cannot bring
myself to
believe you care
***
#118:
yes i could do
anything
if i weren’t me
***
#119:
a tiredness
creeping in
need something new
***
#120:
my teeth all buzz
as if they’re
electrified
***
#121:
imprecision
of language
a failing mind
***
#122:
i cannot write
anything
longer than this
***
#123:
one two three four
five six sev
en eight nine ten
***
#124:
i would blame this
on others
but it’s all me
***
#125:
the crows nested
in my heart
the worms, my mind
***
#126:
i like to sit
by the sea
dream of drowning
***
#127:
a small comfort
in the dream
as if its real
***
#128:
but then i wake
and somehow
its not the same
***
#129:
please forgive me
for my crimes
i’ve repented
***
#130:
i’m just not good
at any
thing at all
__________
Notes:
1. Written in September and October, 2019
2. Previous collections can be found here: #1; #2; #3; #4