Tales From The Town #241: Quiche: A Critique

“Whoever invented quiche is an idiot,” Claire announced. She wasn’t even eating quiche. She was just thinking about it.

“Quiche wasn’t invented,” Daniel said. He wasn’t thinking about quiche at all. He was too busy eating it. “It was discovered.”

“By an idiot,” Claire said, still thinking about quiche. And suddenly also celery. “Whoever invented celery is an idiot.”

“Celery wasn’t invented,” Tina said. She was both thinking and not thinking about celery at the same time. Also she was drinking a cup of tea because she’d already eaten all the celery she could eat and it’d made her feel a bit ill. “It was grown.”

“By an idiot,” Claire said, thinking about quiche and celery now. And suddenly also ravioli. “Whoever invented ravioli is an idiot.”

“Ravioli wasn’t invented,” Ethel said. She was both thinking about and eating ravioli. “It was born.”

“It was not!” said Claire. But now she would never stop thinking about ravioli ever again. Ravioli, and where, where it came from.

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Notes:

1. Written on August 10th, 2026

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Tales From The Town #202: Nostalgia

“Do you remember…?” Daniel said.

“NO!” said Claire.

“But he hasn’t even asked you anything yet, Claire,” said Tina.

“I don’t care,” said Claire. “I am not thinking about the past. The past is BORING!” She picked something up off the ground and then threw it back onto the ground to prove her point. “And it’s stupid.”

“You’re stupid,” said Ethel. “You just threw a boiled egg on the ground.”

“I HATE BOILED EGGS!” said Claire. “And I hate picnics!” Claire stormed off towards the swing and then got on the swing and swung on the swing in as furious a fashion as it was possible for a girl to swing. “AND I HATE ANTS!”

“I think she does remember,” said Daniel.

“I think we all remember,” Agnes sighed, unable to forget.

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Notes:

1. Written on March 31st, 2025

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Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.

(Ko-fi contributors probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more).

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Tales From The Town #104: Ants

“I don’t like ants,” Claire said, as she watched them carry the picnic away piece by piece. “I don’t like ants at all.”

It was, she thought, very important that everybody knew that.

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Notes:

1. Written on June 1st, 2022

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Support An Accumulation Of Things

If you like the things you've read here please consider subscribing to my patreon or my ko-fi.

Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.

(Ko-fi contributors probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more).

Thank you!