Tales From The Town #188: On the Existence Of Hedgehogs

“Do you think hedgehogs actually exist?” Claire asked. “Because I don’t think hedgehogs exist AT ALL!”

This question/declaration of Claire’s had nothing to do with anything anyone had said or that anyone was doing, but it seemed overwhelmingly important to Claire at that precise moment in time. She’d been thinking about this a lot.

“Of course they exist,” said Tina. “Why wouldn’t they exist?”

“Because I’ve never seen one.”

“You have,” Ethel said. “We all have.”

“I haven’t,” said Claire.

“Well I have,” said Ethel. “In the garden.”

“Prove it,” said Claire.

“You prove it,” said Ethel.

“That’s not how proof works,” said Claire.

“You’re not how proof works,” said Ethel.

“I saw two hedgehogs once,” said Daniel.

“You haven’t,” said Claire.

“They were getting married,” said Daniel.

“They weren’t!”

“They had FOUR babies!” said Daniel. “And a nephew.”

“That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard,” said Claire, kicking the pieces off the Monopoly board and storming out of the room before anyone remembered she hadn’t paid off any of her recently declared debts.

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Notes:

1. Written on 17th August, 2024

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