The King And The Peasant
The King said to himself, “To serve my people justly I must know life as they do.” To this end he took off his crown and his fine robes and dressed himself in rags and went out into the streets of his kingdom.
There he met a peasant, who said, “Why, O King, do you dress as a peasant?” The King said, “Why, O Peasant, do you dress as a king?” This baffled the peasant to such an extent that he ran away, fearing the King may be mad.
The King himself went back to his castle, put back on his crown, and pretended he had not left the hall all day. Things continued thereafter as before.
The King And The King Who Looked Exactly Alike
There were two kings who looked exactly alike. The people of both kingdoms said it was a miracle, but in fact it was merely the result of centuries of inbreeding between the ruling families of the region.
Soon after, they were swept away into the sea by a storm of rebellion caused by their own failures, and nothing of value was lost.
The Queen That Couldn’t Be Bothered
There was a Queen who simply could not be bothered. She stayed in bed mostly, and sometimes walked around the garden, but beyond that she had no interest in affairs. She once saw a cat and stroked it for a while, telling it of the wondrous things she had seen in her dreams, but otherwise she spoke to no-one.
She died at the age of 107 and was mourned briefly by all.
The tide that goes out will come in again. The tide that comes in will go out soon enough.
A great poet made mention of this to the king. The King, being ill-equipped to understand metaphor, asked what the hell that had to do with his rule or his kingdom, and the poet was soon after removed from the hall.
1. These were written on July 30th, 2014
2. And have never been used before
3. Primarily because they’re completely pointless
4. Please don’t hate me