The rules of the eclipse were you could only look at the sun when there was no more sun left to see. And even then you still had to wear glasses.
It wasn’t any fun at all.
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Notes:
1. Written on the 2nd of July, 2023
__________tales from the town
Tales From The Town #120: Ice Cream Competition
“Two scoops?!” Tina said, wide eyed with awe. “I’ve never had two scoops before.”
“Mine’s got two scoops too,” said Daniel. “In different flavours!”
“Mine has two scoops and a flake!” said Ethel. “I don’t know what’s gotten into dad but I like it.”
“I think maybe he’s just sad,” said Tina. “He’s not been the same since the mermaid ran off with that walrus last year.”
There was a moment of silence as they contemplated their father, as he counted out his sand and seaweed covered coins at the ice cream counter.
“Yeah, well mine has THREE scoops!” Claire shouted, quickly getting back to what was important. “And I’ve got two of them!” She pulled her arm out from behind her back with a flourish a magician would have been proud of. “You’ll never beat that!”
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Notes:
1. Written on May 26th, 2023
__________Support An Accumulation Of Things
If you like the things you've read here please consider subscribing to my patreon or my ko-fi. Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.(Ko-fi contributors probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more). Thank you!Tales From The Town #119: A Scene From Any Summer
The tennis courts were empty. The gates were shut, locked, padlocked, chained, bolted, and, quite possibly, even welded. No one had set foot inside since 1985 and no one would set foot inside again until 2055 at the very earliest unless something catastrophic happened and even then it was unlikely to be catastrophic enough to change anything that drastically.
The nets fluttered in the wind, as close a thing to genuine ghosts as anything in material existence could ever hope to be.
__________
Notes:
1. Written on May 26th, 2023
__________Support An Accumulation Of Things
If you like the things you've read here please consider subscribing to my patreon or my ko-fi. Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.(Ko-fi contributors probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more). Thank you!Tales From The Town #118: Ted’s Shed
In Ted’s collection of Ted’s things in Ted’s shoeboxes in Ted’s shed in Ted’s Mum’s garden there currently resided:
1. Spider (large)
2. Spiders (small)
3. Cockroach collection
4. Mouse (dead) + maggots (not dead)
5. Slow worm
6. Fast worm
7. More worms (various speeds)
8. [Escaped]
9. Stick insect
10. Stick that looks like an insect
11. Cocoon (unknown inhabitant)
12. Wasps’ nest (empty)
13. Bee hive (full)
14. Ant colony (writhing)
15. Cat (asleep)
16. Rock that looks like a fossil but probably isn’t a fossil
17. Rock that doesn’t look like a fossil but actually is a fossil
18. Assorted skulls
19. Assorted bones
20. Snails
21. Slugs
22. Slugs AND snails
23. Venus fly traps (plus slugs)
24. Shoes (plus snails)
25. Feathers (unsorted)
26. Eggs (dozen)
27. Discarded Selenite shell
28. Doll (awake)
29. Rusted toy car collection (plus a space shuttle)
30. Toenails/teeth (own)
31-50. [Awaiting exhibits]
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Notes:
1. Written on 26th May, 2023
2. Ted previously appeared in Tale #34: The Boy With The Box
3. In case you had forgotten such a memorable chapter in all our lives
Support An Accumulation Of Things
If you like the things you've read here please consider subscribing to my patreon or my ko-fi. Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.(Ko-fi contributors probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more). Thank you!Tales From The Town #117: The Very Nice Tales Of The Very Nice Children Who Live In Very Nice Houses In A Very Nice Town Somewhere Far Far Away
“What are watching, Tina?” Claire asked, snatching Tina’s phone out of her hand to have a look.
“Nothing,” Tuna said, snatching it back to try and stop Claire having a look.
“Well it looks like something!” Claire said, as the phone snatching loop slowly reached equilibrium and it was finally held uneasily exactly midway between both of them. “Wait, what ARE you watching?”
“Nothing,” Tina said. “You wouldn’t like it anyway.”
“I might,” Claire said. “Who’s that?”
“That’s the nice girl,” Tina said. “She’s the main character.”
“And who’s that?”
“That’s the nice boy,” Tina told her. “They’re neighbours.”
“And what’s that?!”
“That’s the nice dog who lives down the lane,” Tina said.
“How stupid,” Claire said. “Who’s ever heard of a nice dog?”
“I have,” Daniel said, much to the cat’s consternation.
“Shut up, Daniel,” Claire said.
“Mum likes dogs too,” Ethel said.
“Only the bad ones,” Claire said. Then she looked back at the phone. “So what are they doing now?”
“They’re having a poetry competition.”
“I thought you hated poetry competitions,” Claire said.
“I do,” Tina said. “And so do they. They’re only in it because their very nice and well-meaning but actually slightly naive teacher hoped it might bring them out of their shells.”
“They don’t even have shells,” Claire said.
“Unlike Claire,” said Daniel, much to the cat’s amusement.
“Shut up, Daniel,” Claire said. “So, wait, are those their poems?” She pointed to the text at the bottom of the screen and read it out slowly and loudly.
“‘Artistic endeavour is not a competitive pursuit.'”
“See?” Tina said. “That’s exactly what I think too. They’re so nice!”
“So stupid, more like,” Claire said. “What sort of poem is that?”
“They’re not poems, Claire. they’re subtitles,” Tina said, as on screen the nice boy told the nice girl that his poems were so personal not even he was allowed to read them and he’d written them, himself, all on his own.
“Why have you got subtitles on?” Claire said. “It’s TV not Read Me!”
“Mine are so personal I only ever wrote them in dust,” the nice girl said. “So that the wind can blow them away as soon as they’re done.”
“Because you won’t shut up and let her hear what they’re saying, Claire,” Ethel said.
“Don’t you tell me to shut up, Ethel!” Claire said. “You shut up!”
“No you!”
“Maybe you could both shut up,” Tina suggested.
“NO!”
“Hey everyone!” Agnes said, as she came in through the front door and popped her head round the corner to say hi. “You all having fun in here?”
“Mum, you won’t believe what Tina’s making us watch in here,” Claire said. “It’s total rubbish!”
“It’s not,” Tina said. “It’s nice.”
“Yeah! Nice and boring!” Claire said. “Honestly, Mum, it’s even worse than Blue Peter!”
“I like Blue Peter,” Daniel said, much to the cat’s complete disbelief. “They make things out of toilet rolls.”
“You’re made out of toilet rolls,” Claire said, as Tina sighed loudly. “Yeah, and so are you, Tina!”
Tina shook her head and slowly faded out of existence and disappeared sadly back to her room. Her phone hovered in the air for a second, before falling to the ground, much to the cat’s sudden startlement.
__________
Notes:
1. Written on April 6th, 2023
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