Tales From The Town #132: The Rudest Word In The Entire World (Part 2)

“Mum! Claire keeps saying rude words!” Ethel said.

“I don’t!” Claire said.

“You do!” Tina said.

“Well, yes, I do! But I don’t care!” Claire said. “All I said was that Tina’s stupid car game was a load of old crap.”

“Claire you shouldn’t say things like that,” Agnes said. “You know Tina likes that car game.”

“Actually, it is kind of rubbish,” Tina said.

“We don’t even know what we’re doing most of the time,” Ethel said.

“Oh,” Agnes said. “So why are you upset with Claire then.”

“Cause she said…” Tina said. “She said that rude word Mum!”

“Daniel might have heard!” Ethel said.

“I was an aeroplane,” Daniel said. “And then I was the dolls’ best friend.” He looked at the cat to make sure she wasn’t jealous. “And then I was a spaceship.”

“See?” Claire said. “Spaceship’s don’t get upset by rude words.”

“Not even intelligent spaceships,” Daniel said, nodding sagely.

“Well, I’m glad this has all been sorted out,” Agnes said. “Also I didn’t even realise crap was a rude word.”

Mum!” Tina and Ethel gasped, utterly shocked, as Daniel ran from the room screaming.

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Notes:

1. Written on July 28th, 2023

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Tales From The Town #131: Descriptions Of The Witch

The witch was
the witch
was
the witch
was the witch

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Notes:

1. Written on July 28th, 2023
2. I think
3. (I forgot to date it at the time)

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Tales From The Town #130: The Rudest Word In The Entire World (Part 1)

“This game is rubbish!” Claire said, kicking the board up in the air and scattering toy cars everywhere. “It’s complete CRAP!”

Claire!” Tina and Ethel exclaimed. “You can’t say that!”

“I can!” Claire said. “And I did!”

“But it’s…. it’s rude!

Really rude!”

“I don’t care!” Claire said. “And you shouldn’t either!”

“But we do!”

“What if Daniel hears!”

“You know how upset he gets about rude words!”

“And rude people!”

“And rudeness in general.”

“Well, maybe Daniel should just shut up!” Claire said.

Daniel came running into the room, arms outstretched, pretending to be an aeroplane. Then he flew back out of the room and up the stairs to play with the dolls, who didn’t swear at all, not even when talking about the witch.

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Notes:

1. Written on July 28th, 2023

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Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.

(Ko-fi contributors probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more).

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Tales From The Town #129: And the apples are all dead at the bottom of their trees

Apples rotting beneath the trees. Teardrop jewelled spider’s webs on the washing line. And in the distance ships lost in the fog out at sea.

Autumn was here, and not even Claire declaring that there’s no such thing as ghost ships could spoil Agnes’s mood.

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Notes:

1. Written on July 27th and August 26th, 2023

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Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.

(Ko-fi contributors probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more).

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Tales From The Town #128: The Diving Pool Incident

Frozen in place at the end of the board, too scared to jump, too embarrassed to turn back.

In years to come it would feel like this moment encompassed two thirds of Tina’s childhood rather than approximately forty five seconds one Saturday afternoon when she was eight.

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Notes:

1. Written on July 7th, 2023

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Support An Accumulation Of Things

If you like the things you've read here please consider subscribing to my patreon or my ko-fi.

Patreon subscribers get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.

(Ko-fi contributors probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more).

Thank you!