{"id":5134,"date":"2023-03-25T10:12:54","date_gmt":"2023-03-25T10:12:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/?p=5134"},"modified":"2023-03-23T12:54:56","modified_gmt":"2023-03-23T12:54:56","slug":"tales-from-the-town-102","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/2023\/03\/25\/tales-from-the-town-102\/","title":{"rendered":"Tales From The Town #102: The Football"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

“Claire! What did you kick it up there for?! We’ll never get it down now.”<\/p>\n

“It wasn’t me!”<\/p>\n

“Well who was it then?”<\/p>\n

“Mum!”<\/p>\n

“It was not Mum. You know she refuses to kick things. She’s a pacifist.”<\/p>\n

“What? Really? Well that’s just stupid.”<\/p>\n

“So it was you?”<\/p>\n

“Of course it was me! Who else would it be?”<\/p>\n

“Mum?”<\/p>\n

“But you said…”<\/p>\n

“I was tricking you into confessing, Claire! Of course Mum’s allowed to kick footballs!”<\/p>\n

\u201cSee, I told you it was stupid! And it was stupid because you made it up, and you\u2019re<\/em> stupid.\u201d<\/p>\n

“So? It worked, didn’t it?.”<\/p>\n

“It did not. I was going to confess anyway. How else would you know it was me otherwise?”<\/p>\n

“Why would you want anyone to know it was you?”<\/p>\n

“Because I was the one that did it!”<\/p>\n

___________<\/p>\n

Notes:<\/p>\n

1. Written on March 17th, 2023<\/em><\/p>\n__________<\/br>

Support An Accumulation Of Things<\/a><\/h3>If you like the things you've read here please consider subscribing to my patreon<\/a> or my ko-fi<\/a>. <\/br><\/br>Patreon subscribers<\/a> get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.<\/br><\/br>(Ko-fi contributors<\/a> probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more). <\/br><\/br>Thank you!<\/i><\/br><\/br>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“Claire! What did you kick it up there for?! We’ll never get it down now.” “It wasn’t me!” “Well who was it then?” “Mum!” “It was not Mum. You know she refuses to kick things. She’s a pacifist.” “What? Really? Well that’s just stupid.” “So it was you?” “Of course it was me! Who else […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1208],"tags":[1451,1450,1078,1209],"class_list":["post-5134","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-tales-from-the-town","tag-confessions","tag-crime","tag-football","tag-tales-from-the-town"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5134","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5134"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5134\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5162,"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5134\/revisions\/5162"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5134"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5134"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5134"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}