{"id":4267,"date":"2022-03-19T07:03:26","date_gmt":"2022-03-19T07:03:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/?p=4267"},"modified":"2022-03-19T21:46:19","modified_gmt":"2022-03-19T21:46:19","slug":"tales-from-the-town-49-shoelaces","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/2022\/03\/19\/tales-from-the-town-49-shoelaces\/","title":{"rendered":"Tales From The Town #49: Shoelaces"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

\u201cShoelaces are so stupid,\u201d Claire said. <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong with shoelaces?\u201d Ethel asked. \u201cThey\u2019re better than velcro.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHey,\u201d Tina said, as she velcro\u2019d her shoes shut. \u201cWhat\u2019s wrong with velcro?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cVelcro comes from space,\u201d Daniel said. \u201cIt\u2019s made by aliens!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo it\u2019s not,\u201d Claire said. \u201cAnyway, velcro\u2019s just as stupid as shoelaces. You don\u2019t get socklaces, do you? You don\u2019t have to velcro your leggings up? They\u2019re rubbish! Why don\u2019t they just make boots that fit your feet?\u201d<\/p>\n

There was not a single person alive who could have adequately answered her question. Nor was there anyone who dared try.<\/p>\n

__________<\/p>\n

Notes:<\/p>\n

1. Written on June 24th, 2021<\/em><\/p>\n__________<\/br>

Support An Accumulation Of Things<\/a><\/h3>If you like the things you've read here please consider subscribing to my patreon<\/a> or my ko-fi<\/a>. <\/br><\/br>Patreon subscribers<\/a> get not just early access to content and also the occasional gift, but also my eternal gratitude. Which I'm not sure is very useful, but is certainly very real.<\/br><\/br>(Ko-fi contributors<\/a> probably only get the gratitude I'm afraid, but please get in touch if you want more). <\/br><\/br>Thank you!<\/i><\/br><\/br>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cShoelaces are so stupid,\u201d Claire said. \u201cWhat\u2019s wrong with shoelaces?\u201d Ethel asked. \u201cThey\u2019re better than velcro.\u201d \u201cHey,\u201d Tina said, as she velcro\u2019d her shoes shut. \u201cWhat\u2019s wrong with velcro?\u201d \u201cVelcro comes from space,\u201d Daniel said. \u201cIt\u2019s made by aliens!\u201d \u201cNo it\u2019s not,\u201d Claire said. \u201cAnyway, velcro\u2019s just as stupid as shoelaces. You don\u2019t get socklaces, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1208],"tags":[1192,1263,1209],"class_list":["post-4267","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-tales-from-the-town","tag-a-cast-of-characters","tag-shoelaces","tag-tales-from-the-town"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4267","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4267"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4267\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4449,"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4267\/revisions\/4449"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4267"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4267"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/accumulationofthings.com\/things\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4267"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}